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About Varied / Student Premium Member Brandon21/Male/United States Groups :iconphotography-express: Photography-Express
Inspired photography.
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Artist | Student | Varied
United States

Lost in Isolation

Journal Entry: Wed Jan 28, 2015, 5:49 PM
I often feel like moving away from pony fan art. My happiness is diminishing and my mind is all over the place. Perhaps I'm digging myself into a dark hole of obligation and disappointment. Honestly, I don't think my drawings are anything more than okay, if not less so. I don't even have the courage to call myself an artist, more like an empty shell. I don't see a realistic future ahead of me. I have tried improving myself as a person by myself, but struggle with this notion of “talent” and how little value I perceive in my work. People may disagree with me, but that's okay. Most of what I feel is often expressed in my work in one way or another. I find it better to manifest emotion on pictures. It helps to suppress my overall anger and exhaustion with life itself, as well as appreciate the small bits of joy that comes with it. The only reason that keeps me from giving up is hope. Hope in ideas. Ideas that reach people, no matter where they are. This is both comforting and meaningless. Everything beyond my computer screen is another world entirely that I don't feel a part of. I don't know if I should keep going with this. I haven't spoken to another soul in any meaningful way in years. This isolation is likely to continue, if not get worse as time goes on. I can hope for miracles, but I'm afraid I don't believe in them. Things happen. I would rather wait for my time to be wasted than spend my days breaking my leg. Its seems like a safe bet. I guess I'll do that for now.

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  • Mood: Isolated


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uniqueyourself Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Hobbyist Artist
Thanks for the Llama
durringwepon389 Featured By Owner 3 days ago
Give me one get one in return. ^^
flamevulture17 Featured By Owner 2 days ago  Student General Artist
durringwepon389 Featured By Owner 2 days ago
For the llama. ^^
ShimmyCocoPuffssX1 Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
thanks for the fave n_n
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