Out of touch.

There's not a lot I have to say, because what am I supposed to say? I have been fading out of touch with pretty much everything, but not out of mind. Many things plague my small existence, that includes drawing less, talking less, eating less, pretty much less of everything I can think of. I am not who I used to be. To think one year ago I hit a peak. Now comes the valley. I don't know what's wrong, just that I wish that I could fix it. I'm not sure if I can do it on my own. And yet here I am, trying to do everything myself. I guess that's just part of growing up. Even after twenty-two years, all that I have seen feels like it was all for nothing. If could go out in the street and scream to the stars about how much I hate what I've done for the world, I would. But knowing me, don't count on it. I am not a happy person. Unlike many of you nice folks, I haven't a single friend. Anymore. I used to. But my definition of a friend has changed, and the is no one I know that fits that description. What does that mean? Not a thing. The more I try to understand it, the worse it feels. I guess it's better not to know, right? But I'm human, I must know. It's part of my nature, as it is for everyone else. Curiosity and fear sometimes become the same thing, and then everything suddenly real. Then that's when I have to wake up.